In one of my post I went off my ex wife. Yeah she treats me like shit and I do try to avoid her at all cost. If some one is going to treat you with out respect, why should you even give them the time of day. There is only one problem with that attitude. I have two kids by her, while they are both grown up there will be situations where I will have to deal with her in the future. The thing is when she asked me for money I would have gave it to her if I had it. Right now I don't. With the price of gas now almost three fifty a gallon it seems it is taking every spare dime I have just to drive back and forth to work. On top of that I have some serious issues concerning my house that I have to deal with. The kind of issues that could very well turn in to major projects. My personal finances at this time are such that I can not afford to have any more payments.
I actually have three problems with my house that I have recently discovered. The first problem I have a drain pipe under my kitchen that I think might be busted. Normally this might not be a problem to fix. Just go to home depot and spend a few dollars on parts and glue and crawl under there and splice things up. The problem is I have almost no room to crawl under the house. The second problem is I have a water valve that is leaking pretty bad and needs to be replaced. The third problem my sewer is running slow. I have talked to a plumber about these problems and each time I talk to him the price keeps going up. It has gone up from an initial bid of six to eight hundred dollars to twenty three hundred dollars. I have decided to not let the plumber handle it and to attempt to make the repairs my self. I know that sounds scary to some people but I have dealt with this kind of work in the past myself. If I could afford it I would rather hire some one else to do it for me but when I don't have the money I am not left with any other choice.
Wsih me luck in this project
Friday, April 25, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
about my last post
In my last post I made some comments I think some of you might misunderstand. Primarily concerning the sexuality of the ass hole my wife had the affair with. I just wanted to make it clear the way I feel about him is because he selfishly put his feelings ahead of others when it came to starting an affair with my wife. Yes he is a homosexual male and the last I heard he was living happily ever after with another man named Jack. Too bad he had to destroy some one else's marriage to come to grips with that. Was he the sole cause of the destruction of my marriage? The answer would be no, my ex shares half of the blame with him because she made a conscious decision to join him in there encounters. Rather than come to me she chose to go to him to talk to him about the things that bothered her. I would have done my best to talk about the things she was concerned with and be supportive in the things she wanted to change. When it come to some ones sexual preference I don't care what it is. What ever makes you happy is ok with me. I just think it should be between consenting adults. If your in a relationship you have to keep in mind that what ever your doing and who your doing it with can have potential to cause some one else serious pain if your doing it behind your significant others back. No matter what your sexual preference is cheating is wrong on so many levels and that is what he and my ex did to me and my kids.
I also made some comments about my ex wife's weight. I am going to come out and say I prefer plus size women. That being said a persons health should come first and you should not let your self get to freakish proportions that will lead to health problems. Our society is sending us a dual message in the media they tout the so called lean healthy look while we get deluged with advertisements for all kinds of junk food and restaurants that serve enough in one serving to feed a small family in the third world for one meal. I think because food is so abundant and so cheap in our country we have turned it in to a source of recreation, which I think is wrong. I really think we as a society need to rethink how we view food in this country.
With that being said about food I think we should take a look at what we perceive as the ideal for beauty in woman and men. Right now the ideal is so totally unrealistic and out of touch with reality you would think some of the characters sprang from a comic book page. Movies and TV shows coming out of Hollywood are replete with actors and actresses with less than 10% body fat. The reality is the only way a person can achieve that conditioning is through strict limited diet and spending multiple hours a day in a gym doing strenuous work out. Try doing that keep and full time job. Just for every ones information my current stats are, I am currently 6'2" 243lb 38' waist 48" chest with 16% body fat. I do monitor my diet and exercise twice a week at a gym. Like I said before I am 52 years old and at that age a person has to speceal considerations concerning their health.
I also made some comments about my ex wife's weight. I am going to come out and say I prefer plus size women. That being said a persons health should come first and you should not let your self get to freakish proportions that will lead to health problems. Our society is sending us a dual message in the media they tout the so called lean healthy look while we get deluged with advertisements for all kinds of junk food and restaurants that serve enough in one serving to feed a small family in the third world for one meal. I think because food is so abundant and so cheap in our country we have turned it in to a source of recreation, which I think is wrong. I really think we as a society need to rethink how we view food in this country.
With that being said about food I think we should take a look at what we perceive as the ideal for beauty in woman and men. Right now the ideal is so totally unrealistic and out of touch with reality you would think some of the characters sprang from a comic book page. Movies and TV shows coming out of Hollywood are replete with actors and actresses with less than 10% body fat. The reality is the only way a person can achieve that conditioning is through strict limited diet and spending multiple hours a day in a gym doing strenuous work out. Try doing that keep and full time job. Just for every ones information my current stats are, I am currently 6'2" 243lb 38' waist 48" chest with 16% body fat. I do monitor my diet and exercise twice a week at a gym. Like I said before I am 52 years old and at that age a person has to speceal considerations concerning their health.
Some times you get so mad
Let's face it when you get to be over forty you do tend to build up a lot of life experience. Some of it good and some of it bad. I was married and divorced from my first wife before I met Joy. I will be honest here I truly did love my first wife and I was devoted to her before the marriage went in to the shitter. Sure we had problems when we were together and to be honest most of the problems centered around money. It seems money problems kill more marriages than infidelity. I think if two people can't come to an agreement on how to handle the family finances the marriage is doomed to failure. My ex-wife has more than her share of personal problems and it was hard to live with those problems while we were married. I will admit to occasional out burst of being an asshole. Those out burst were due mostly in frustration in dealing with her personal problems. Those problems included a eating disorder, managing credit cards and a self image that she could never get over. She blamed me for her short comings and failures in life. In time this really challenged my own self esteem and self worth as a man.
She was a compulsive over eater, I mean she literally could not stop eating once she started. It was nothing for her to eat a family size bag of potato chips in one setting. with certain foods she could eat enough for five to six people in one setting. It should be no surprise this disorder led to extreme weight problems on her part. Some of the worst arguments we had while we were married was over her weight. Yeah I know your thinking I was just your typical guy who did not like the way his fat wife looked. To be honest that was part of it, I was also deeply concerned about her health. Let's face it extreme obesity will lead to serious life threatening health issues as you get older and my worst fear at the time was that she would be in her late forties or early fifties fighting chronic heart disease or out of control diebetise. I was scared shittless while we were married that she would die from those health issues way before her time, like in her late forties or early fifties.
Her lack of self control with credit cards ruined the family finances. Hell ruined is not a strong enough term. When I filed for divorce we were bankrupt. To add insult to injury she refused to go through bankruptcy at the time. My attorney advised me at the time not to declare bankruptcy until she did. It has been ten years since the divorce. Financially it has been a real hard ten years for me. At times they seemed almost impossible to get through and I have had to learn some hard lessons along the way. Things have gotten better, I still have some tough times with money or the lack of it. I have gotten through it with out having to go through bankruptcy.
Here are the circumstances of my divorce, it all started when she started to spend Saturdays shopping with a friend she worked with named Jean. Jean was the first but not the only bad influence on her. Shortly after she started to hang out with Jean My ex, Jean her husband and I went to the Moody Blues Concert in Des Moines, Iowa. Before the concert the four of us went out to dinner. My ex and I figured this would be a fun evening for the four of us. We were wrong, there is nothing more miserable than spending a evening with a couple who flat out hate each other and who spend there time taking out their anger and frustrations on each other. Jean also had a extreme problem with money in that she would spend all of her take home pay each Saturday shopping buying mostly stuff for her kids. Most of the stuff she purchased they didn't need or want. Pretty soon my ex wife was doing exactly the same thing.
The other thing was she started to have an affair with a co worker named Kevin Babcock who work at the State of Iowa Department of Human Services. During the affair the two of them talked about everything with each other. During one of those conversations my ex made the mistake of confiding that she was attracted to women sexually. Kevin convinced her that she was a lesbian and that she would never be happy unless she started to have relationships with women. I'm not shitting you on this, their plan was to get together and have a show marriage while the two of them can go out and act on there homosexual feelings. Kevin had his own agenda in that he was gay and his mother was leaning on him real hard to settle down and have a family. He saw an opportunity for that with my wife in that he thought I would just disappear to where most ex husbands are suppose to go so that he could be the daddy to my kids. Hear is some information on dear old Kevin, at the time he was forty years old up until that time he had never had a relationship with any one that lasted longer than two years and all of those relationships were with women. Up until then he never had a relationship with a man, all of his experiences with men were casual sex encounters that we now refer to as down low experiences. I never fully understood what she saw in him till I found a picture of him 6 months after the divorce after he gained alot of weight. He looked just like her dad.
Ten years after the fact what does this have to do with what is going on today. It is pretty simple I kept my child support current and my youngest graduated from High school last year when my youngest graduated my child support obligation ended and her money problems began. I have found out she is going to file for bankruptcy and she hit my up for some money to help them through. I said no she got pissed and started to go off on me and I ended up calling her a fucking bitch and stupid cunt. Do I feel bad about that.......no I don't. Both of my kids have also imformed me that she has developed serious health problems most of them caused by her weight problem. she has shrunk two inches since we divorced and her height is now 5'3" and her weight is ballooned up to almost 400lb. She can't walk for short distances with out the aid of a cane. She suffers selling of the her feet to the point she can't wear shoes. Her problems are not my problems and if she can't deal with that it is too fucking bad. I will not put up with her shit any more.
She was a compulsive over eater, I mean she literally could not stop eating once she started. It was nothing for her to eat a family size bag of potato chips in one setting. with certain foods she could eat enough for five to six people in one setting. It should be no surprise this disorder led to extreme weight problems on her part. Some of the worst arguments we had while we were married was over her weight. Yeah I know your thinking I was just your typical guy who did not like the way his fat wife looked. To be honest that was part of it, I was also deeply concerned about her health. Let's face it extreme obesity will lead to serious life threatening health issues as you get older and my worst fear at the time was that she would be in her late forties or early fifties fighting chronic heart disease or out of control diebetise. I was scared shittless while we were married that she would die from those health issues way before her time, like in her late forties or early fifties.
Her lack of self control with credit cards ruined the family finances. Hell ruined is not a strong enough term. When I filed for divorce we were bankrupt. To add insult to injury she refused to go through bankruptcy at the time. My attorney advised me at the time not to declare bankruptcy until she did. It has been ten years since the divorce. Financially it has been a real hard ten years for me. At times they seemed almost impossible to get through and I have had to learn some hard lessons along the way. Things have gotten better, I still have some tough times with money or the lack of it. I have gotten through it with out having to go through bankruptcy.
Here are the circumstances of my divorce, it all started when she started to spend Saturdays shopping with a friend she worked with named Jean. Jean was the first but not the only bad influence on her. Shortly after she started to hang out with Jean My ex, Jean her husband and I went to the Moody Blues Concert in Des Moines, Iowa. Before the concert the four of us went out to dinner. My ex and I figured this would be a fun evening for the four of us. We were wrong, there is nothing more miserable than spending a evening with a couple who flat out hate each other and who spend there time taking out their anger and frustrations on each other. Jean also had a extreme problem with money in that she would spend all of her take home pay each Saturday shopping buying mostly stuff for her kids. Most of the stuff she purchased they didn't need or want. Pretty soon my ex wife was doing exactly the same thing.
The other thing was she started to have an affair with a co worker named Kevin Babcock who work at the State of Iowa Department of Human Services. During the affair the two of them talked about everything with each other. During one of those conversations my ex made the mistake of confiding that she was attracted to women sexually. Kevin convinced her that she was a lesbian and that she would never be happy unless she started to have relationships with women. I'm not shitting you on this, their plan was to get together and have a show marriage while the two of them can go out and act on there homosexual feelings. Kevin had his own agenda in that he was gay and his mother was leaning on him real hard to settle down and have a family. He saw an opportunity for that with my wife in that he thought I would just disappear to where most ex husbands are suppose to go so that he could be the daddy to my kids. Hear is some information on dear old Kevin, at the time he was forty years old up until that time he had never had a relationship with any one that lasted longer than two years and all of those relationships were with women. Up until then he never had a relationship with a man, all of his experiences with men were casual sex encounters that we now refer to as down low experiences. I never fully understood what she saw in him till I found a picture of him 6 months after the divorce after he gained alot of weight. He looked just like her dad.
Ten years after the fact what does this have to do with what is going on today. It is pretty simple I kept my child support current and my youngest graduated from High school last year when my youngest graduated my child support obligation ended and her money problems began. I have found out she is going to file for bankruptcy and she hit my up for some money to help them through. I said no she got pissed and started to go off on me and I ended up calling her a fucking bitch and stupid cunt. Do I feel bad about that.......no I don't. Both of my kids have also imformed me that she has developed serious health problems most of them caused by her weight problem. she has shrunk two inches since we divorced and her height is now 5'3" and her weight is ballooned up to almost 400lb. She can't walk for short distances with out the aid of a cane. She suffers selling of the her feet to the point she can't wear shoes. Her problems are not my problems and if she can't deal with that it is too fucking bad. I will not put up with her shit any more.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
welcome to my world
Well why not it seems every one is starting to blog now so I just thought I would kick in my two cents. This is just the beginning let's see what happens
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